


Beep

by gracefulally



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), American Idol RPF, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004), Kris Allen (Musician)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Community: kradam_kiss, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-04-15
Updated: 2010-04-15
Packaged: 2017-10-23 15:06:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/251671
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gracefulally/pseuds/gracefulally
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kris and Adam play a "game" after sex that involves just a blanket and their thoughts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Beep

**Author's Note:**

> Flash ficlet set in an Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind AU for a Kradam Big Bang fic that never happened.

The game they played after sex usually ended in someone’s tears. Actually, it wasn’t so much a game as a therapy session. It had started out as a way to keep warm. One of them would grab the bed’s quilt and throw it over their naked and sweaty bodies, which shivered from exposure to the room’s cool air. They’d lay there beneath the quilt with mussed heads of hair covered, on top of the tangled sheets, with nothing between them but their hot and shallow breathing, and share their insecurities, their fears, and sometimes their joy. Kris couldn’t remember whose idea it had been to play the quilt game, but it had quickly become a habit that neither seemed willing to part with.

Kris had thrown the quilt over them today. He snuggled down and reached out to dance his fingers over the back of Adam’s hand. It was stifling beneath the quilt, but sweating was the least of Kris’s worries at that moment. Adam’s blue eyes shone; his tears evident even in the dim light.

“Do you think I’m attractive?” Adam quietly asked as he pulled his hand away from Kris.

Kris blinked, clearly confused. “Huh?”

“Am I attractive?”

“Adam,” Kris began softly, “you are the most beautiful person I’ve ever known.”

Silence passed as they traded stares. Kris’s mouth hung agape as he tried to read Adam’s face, which was as blank as a piece of unused paper. Kris’s mouth clapped shut when tears started to slide down from Adam’s eyes and over his nose to mingle with the sweat on his face. Kris wiped them away with gentle touches. Still, Adam said nothing.

“Do you think you’re attractive?” Kris finally asked.

Adam let out a shaky sigh. “It’s taken so much work to get to where I am, now,” he said before raking his teeth over his bottom lip. “And I still find things wrong – my body’s not toned enough, I could still lose a little weight, my skin still needs work, and I’ll never be able to get away from these damn freckles.”

It hurt Kris’s heart to hear him talk like this. It wasn’t the first time that Adam had aired this insecure side, but Kris would never be used to it or able to handle it with strength. “Adam,” Kris whispered compassionately as he pushed up the quilt to slide closer.

“I’ve been covering it all up for years,” Adam continued as Kris dug for a hold around him. “It’s all a ruse to hide everything. You’re attracted to someone fake.”

Kris gathered Adam to his bare chest. He squeezed Adam and then pawed for back muscles. “No, you’re beautiful,” he said insistently. “You’re beautiful without it all.”

Adam shivered as Kris kissed his neck, his jaw, his chest, and anything else within reach. “You’re beautiful,” Kris said, pressing a kiss to Adam’s shoulder. “You’re beautiful.”

Breaking down, Adam coughed out a sob. “You make me feel beautiful. I’ve never felt beautiful. I was always the ugly kid,” he said in a burst before shuddering into more tears.

“You’re beautiful,” Kris continued to repeat like a mantra as his eyes prickled at the corners. “You’re beautiful, Adam.”

“I don’t want to forget this,” Adam whispered in pain. “Please, don’t let me forget this.”

Kris didn’t have a chance to ask what Adam meant before the memory of him was gone; fizzled away with the mechanical beep of a machine.


End file.
